Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Confession


 
You were a stranger once,
sitting on the chair,
with your hair cascading down,
your frame seemed so fragile.
I must confess..

I must confess..
You made me so nervous,
face so innocent
with your eyes so true,
I faltered, as I tried to hide my love


You called my name,
words failed me
with your voice like a lilting flute, 
I was so weak, I just sang along
I must confess..

I must confess..
A 1000 miles away on  my own,
lying on my back on the roof, walking on the sidewalk; I am alone,
so far away yet so close,
I hold you ever so dearly within my heart as I await


The longing to hold you remains,
romantic in me craves,
for I was lost in the gloomy abyss without hope.
your love saved me like sunshine; the flame still remains.
I must confess..

I must confess..
All the days we have been apart
my love has grown stronger,
Eternally, this bond will last,
My love, I will love you forever, forever.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Suicide


Today

26 August 2009

A hot spurt of sand laden wind almost charred his face. His head felt dizzy due to pain. He felt as if he had just come out into lights after years of darkness. Unable to open eyes, he stood; lying down on the roasting sand. He tried to grope around, trying to feel his surrounding. It did not help. The only texture he felt was of the burning sand blistering his hand. After struggling a long time, he mustered enough will power to sit up, unable to open his eyes, blinded by the glowing milieu. Suddenly, a gust of wind threw him back to the ground. He felt his senses going blur and the body losing its consciousness. He felt he was in hell.

He slowly opened his eyes. Everything seemed very dark. All the things seemed hazy as if the world around was moving at a faster pace than his own body. His head still hurt. He glanced above. He saw something which seemed almost like an anticlimax to what he had experienced earlier. The bright light was gone. The hot wind was gone. The hot scorching feeling of the sand was gone. He saw a soothing and cool night sky lit by stars. He was still wondering whether he was dead or was it just a nightmare. He tried to sit up to get a better look. His eyes almost popped out, after what he saw. He could not grasp whether it was fear or anger, but it was certainly not a feeling of excitement. He was lying in the middle of a desert endless like an ocean of sand.

He tried to turn his head to his left. He suddenly felt a surge of pain. He also became aware of a rope tied around his head and the bruises around his neck. He was weak and could not move. He could even feel the rope weighing him down. The whole situation made him feel as a game trapped in a snare, waiting for the hunter to return for his catch. The desert seemed endless and the pain unbearable. An excruciating death seemed inevitable. Suddenly an unusual sight caught his attention; the lone tree standing in the midst of this desert. He saw a rope clinging to one of the branches of the stagnant flora. He was fully aware of his surroundings now and his mind was racing. One thing kept troubling him, what had brought him to this place? Why was he lying there alone? Who or what did this to him? How long has he been out there? What was the way out of this place? The most important of all, who was he??

Pondering over the questions, he concluded that someone had tried to hang him to death. The noose around his neck told the shocking story about the attempt. “But who would want to do this to me?” he thought. “Did I do something wrong?” trying to remember. Pushing his memory to the limit, he sought the event that had led to this predicament. But no, his mind was still numb. It was as if someone had erased all the memories of his past.

While going over the possibilities in his mind, he tried to get to his feet. After two or three attempts he stood up eerily on three limbs. He then surveyed the place for water or food. He found none. The place was a desert stretching in either direction as far as his eyes could see. The only living creature in sight was the lone dilapidated tree which stood out of its surroundings. “How can something grow in such a place?” he said to himself. All of a sudden, something caught his eye. It was some sort of a bag. He hurried towards the bag like a hungry piranha over meat. He almost fell down in doing so. He flung open the bag and emptied its content. All he found was a bottle and a few clothes. He quickly picked up the bottle and shook it like a boy trying to guess the present without opening the wrapping. He was disappointed. No water. No food. Disappointed he surveyed the bag carefully. He found a small diary. The last entry simply said, “Kill @ 25/08/09”.

It had been 10 hours since he had found the notebook. The questions still remained. Whose diary was it? Why and who does the owner want to kill? He had been thinking hard about survival; thinking how to device a way to get out of the desert, alive!! It was dawn. The light rays had started heating the sand. The air was still cool and the sand warm. He had not found food or water. He had climbed up a sand dune to survey the surround. It was all barren; in all directions as far as the eyes saw. Then he remembered. It came to him as a shock. He trembled with sudden awareness. He felt a sudden rush of blood to his limbs and felt a little queasy. He let a loud cry out. “Noooahhh!!” he screamed. He had retraced the chain events that lead him to that place.

Earlier

20 August 2009

It was his first day in the desert. He had lost his way on the very first day. It was almost dark and the day had been like a long struggle. He had not found any food or water. He was looking for settlements or any trails of life. He found none. The desert was relentless and unforgiving. Moreover, he felt, it was interminable.

Ambling around for 4 days, he had not found any help. He was tired and sore. He had used up all his supplies. He was stuck in this hell hole with no escape. He was to die a long agonizing death. The idea of death had settled in his mind. He had given up hope and death seemed inescapable. It was as if was like a moth driven by the sole urge to reach the source of light; as if he was not thinking, like a zombie. He was desperate.

Yesterday

25 August 2009

On the 5 day, he came across a palm tree and decided to put an end to the misery. He waited for the night to end. He wanted it to see the sun rise for the last time. He decided to spent his last night watching the stars and naming them after someone he had left. It was his way of connecting the dots. He retraced his life back to his school days. “It was a nice life”, he thought to himself. “I will miss it”, he said with teary eyes and a hollow voice. It was dawn. It was TIME. He climbed up the tree and tied the rope he had. The other end was knotted into a noose. He said his prayers and remembered his loved ones. He thanked everyone and sang his favorite song. He did not remember its words but he hummed its tune. He walked to the tree as he sang. He was trying to soak in everything around him. He thought,” How difficult was it to take ones life, knowing that it will end?”He wondered, “How come people commit suicides so easily?” He was now climbing the tree. He felt the wind growing stronger and warmer as he moved up. It was caressing his hair like easing him into the ritual. He was not afraid of heights but the knowledge of killing himself was making him dizzy. He was weak, but he had to do it. He had to. To spare himself the misery, to end the endless, to save him- he had to kill himself.

He adorned the noose around his neck with full knowledge of the consequences. The noose was like a badge, his last accomplishment. He lifted his gaze to the heavens for the last time and dove. It was all very quick. He felt the air gushing out of his stomach. He found himself hanging in mid air and struggling for air. He had not died. He was in pain. The rope snapped and he fell on the ground, knocked unconscious.


PS: Suicide is never the answer, it just questions your will. Do not resort to suicides.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

To the horizon



Keats, a fighter kite, was flying casually and carefree. Suddenly, a kite drew close. She dived in, tangling their lines. She was the most colorful and delicate of kites. He avoided the fight and untangled. But her owner attacked again. They were snarled together and then it happened. They flew together in tandem like dancing in the sky like hugging each other and holding hands. Suddenly he realized her line going slack. She pulled away, fading. He fought the drag and knotted her line to his. She was twisting as if in pain, clinging on against the wind. They heard a line snap. He realized they were sailing away, tied together. His line had given away. They flew free, reaching out to the horizon.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Essay: Role of Rules and Procedures in reducing corruption

Rules and procedures are the strategic link between an organization's goals and its day-to-day operations. Well laid down rules & procedures allow employees to understand their roles and responsibilities within predefined limits. Policies and procedures identify the key activities that provide a general strategy to decision-makers on how to handle issues as they arise. This is accomplished by providing the reader with limits and a choice of alternatives that can be used to "guide" their decision making processes. There may be a case when the authority may not dispatch his duties as proscribed. Such an abuse of entrusted authority for personal gain is known as corruption. Fundamentally there are two distinct types of corruption. The former occurs where services or contracts are provided "according to the rule." and the later when transactions are "against the rule." In the first type, the decision maker is receives private gain illegally for doing something that he or she is ordinarily obliged to do by law. In the second type, a bribe is paid to obtain services that the official is prohibited from providing. In addition corruption in an organization may take several forms and involves a wide range of actors. It may involve bribes, theft of public funds or property, cronyism, political interference, criminal extortion, embezzlement or hierarchical pressures within the organization. So a meticulously laid down set of guidelines is necessary to govern the behavior of officials under such circumstances. Hence the role of rules and procedures in curbing corruption for any business is pivotal one.

Proficiently laid down rules and procedures will help eliminate common misunderstandings by identifying job responsibilities and establishing boundaries for powers of the job holders. These procedures will aid in doing away with the illicit use of position. Consider the case when a company employee is not delivering the goods. Without policies and procedures a manager or owner could be creative or capricious in how he/she handles the situations. They may give the employee more help in terms of training, let the employee slide on discipline or terminate the employee. Management has complete discretion to do what they want. Moreover, in a few cases the employee concerned may use external influences or grafts to stay in the organization. But with rules and procedures expertly jotted down, the governing body will not have any trouble in making accountable and impartial decisions.

At the same time, rules and procedures help the larger organizations in reaching decisions under debatable circumstances and maintain transparency. Let us say that employee X (minority) was terminated and employee Y (majority) was given additional training. Without a framework of guidelines it could be concluded that the company willfully discriminated against the minority employee. They had no legal basis for the decision they made. The termination was questionable and could have been initiated out of personal interests. While in reality, Employee X was terminated because he/she had accrued a number of negative disciplinary actions but employee Y was given additional training because it was his/her first infraction. Since this was outlined in the manual the company has justified its decision. With a policy & procedure manual the decision makers have adhered to an implied contract of terms of employment between the company and the employee, willingly or forcibly, thereby avoiding conflict with personal gains and hence promoting transparency and equity.

Furthermore, as the organization grows larger the vision and motives of the employees may not be aligned with those of the company. As the grades of employee increase, so do the chances of their decisions being clouded by corruption or externally influenced. Having well drawn rules keeps everyone thinking along the same lines and keeps corruption under check.

With all said, excessive rules and procedures too can be harmful to an organization. As the complexity and number of rules and procedure grows the propensity of unregulated behavior increases. The lack of requisite information makes the employees or customers unaware of their rights and vulnerable to discretionary treatment and exploitation. In addition greater the number of procedures, greater will be the window of opportunities for corruption. Besides lack of information, assigning a high degree of discretion power without adequate vigilance, monitoring and reporting system will lead to higher subversion rates. The greater the discretion, the greater the opportunity the officials have to provide “favorable” interpretations of rules and procedures to their customers in exchange of illegal payments.

Another detrimental effect of elaborate rules and procedure is slow dispatch of vital decisions and retarded growth which in turn feeds corruption. This red-tapism has a snowballing effect starting from higher administration to lower echelons. The officials take advantage of their positions to hold up or change decisions for personal interests. Administrative efficiency is at a low level because patronage and nepotism tend to encourage the recruitment of incompetent people. This induces a corrupt mindset in the organization and even honest individuals abet as “team players” in the whole exercise. In addition to the time taking decision making progress, the rigid rules also deter innovators leaving them at the mercy of corrupt officials. Lack of flexibility and the slow progress frustrates innovators, thereby forcing them to resort to corrupt ways. Finally, even businesses do not want a lot of rules and procedures because they limit management’s control and creativity.

Corruption is like diabetes, can be controlled, but not totally eliminated. A more realistic goal will be to restrain it within tolerable limits. Rules and procedures, if designed according to the needs of the region and business, have the potential to check and combat corruption. But a delicate balance should be established between rigidity and flexibility of these rules, avoiding either extreme. This must be rightly coupled with a check and balance mechanism to ensure efficacy. Taking everything into account it can be safely concluded that rules and regulations have a crucial role in the reduction of corruption in a large profit oriented organization.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Reminiscing..



Cheers
to the place..
to the rat race..
to the lyf's easy pace..
to the amazing frnds..
to the crazy profs..
to the hectic OP..
to the dreadful farewell..
to the 8 semesters..
to the 8 midsems..
to the 8 endsems..
to the 2 suppli..
to the 4 DP's..
to the 1 hall..
to the supporting hallmates..
to the forever wingies..
to the unfortunate 'batti' depmates..
to the first year bros..
to the insipid food..
to the occasional flood..
to the seeping ceilings..
to the broken window panes..
to the ____ bongs..
to the frustrating bengali..
to the awesome moments..
to the arbit frusstapas..
to the lifesaving DC++..
to the unbearable powercuts..
to the very long labs..
to the boring lectures..
to the tempo of ILU..
to the hall enthu..
to the fending teams..
to the lasting groups..
to the coveted GCs..
to the dream FTs..
to the fun hangouts..
to the long nightouts..
to the inclement summers..
to the eternal rains..
to the cool winters..
to the beautiful springs..
to the small stories..
to the huge events..
to the first drink..
to the last class..
to the laughs we shared..
to the pain we bore..
to the fake medical certies..
to the real hospitalizations..
to the little lessons learnt..
to the sleepless nights spent..
to the short trips..
to the kolkata visits..
to the long walks..
to the mess top..
to the free flowing booze..
to the expensive treats..
to the very old cheddi..
to the always tikka..
to the apna ravida..
to the impossible breakfasts..
to the unavoidable midnight snacks..
to the much hated pappus..
to the other restaurants..
to the TSG..
to the techmarket..
to the 2.2 ..
to the CL..
to the load..
to the peace..
to the old mates..
to the new that awaits..

Cheers to all frnds..Cheers to the time I spent..Cheers to journey called life..
Cheers to the KGP Spirit..

Followers